Mind, Body, Soul And I

Mind body soul and I
Met together one day
Each looked miffed with the other
My soul looked at me in dismay

First spoke my mind –
It looked at my shattered heart
‘Why don’t you stop?
Giving and giving with no boundaries at all?
To people who don’t care in the first place!
When will you learn to balance?
When will you begin to weigh your options?
And stop squandering yourself thin for the undeserving?’

My heart glared at my mind,
And spoke it in a tone annoyed-
‘I wouldn’t have lost so many people
Had it not been for your obstinate ways
Your ego destroyed so many good relationships,
I lost hard earned friendships.
Love is not your logic or math or science
Look at the soul, how shattered it is
For once can you maintain silence?’

And they continued to argue,
My heart and my mind
Such opposites they are
I wonder how together they reside
They blamed each other, counted all the losses
Oh what a headache to hear the same rut again

I looked at my soul, tears in my eyes,
Of pity or of empathy I do not know,
It looked at me with a weary smile
And said –
I am eternal and unaffected,
Yet reflect the state of my abode,
Go speak to your body once
That’s your only hope.

Hence, I traversed to each of my bodies one by one,
In hope to understand what wrong I had done
I, consciousness, what was I not able to see
What mystery was hidden from my awareness?
Where do I need to shift my attention?

First to receive me was the physical body,
Beyond any resemblance to how it was the time before,
Dark, neglected, mute it stood before me,
The bones and veins through the skin I could see.
I told it of my purpose, and narrated my journey
Then it spoke to me –
Ah! How you’ve grown my dear!
All the sleepless nights and irregular schedules
Have finally amounted to something good
I am just a machine, bound to fail one day
Don’t worry, you’ll find another soon
Though my joints ache, and my back is bent,
I still can carry you just fine
I am blessed to be at your service
Your soul is truly divine
I greeted my limbs, organs and bones,
I sailed through the veins, my blood the river
I stayed in the warmth of my heart
Restless, finicky, looking in plight
Though my heart appeared just fine
It beat faster and harder,
Trying to push through the blockages
Each beat was a fight
The sounds echoing back from the darkness around
It looked at me, like a mother looking at his son,
It told me to go upstairs and rest.

I climbed the ladder from heart,
And knocked on the door of my ether,
The source of all my energy,
My second body,
From which stemmed my will and vitality.
I looked in amazement at her,
As she weaved all the cords
Cords that connect me to the rest
Deftly and gently her hands moved
She nurtured everyone with great care
Golden threads forming a tapestry of grandeur unseen
Amidst black threads that were increasing on the scene
She threw me a glance, judging my expressions
Pointed upstairs with her eyebrow and shrugged

I climbed up to my favorite room,
I was shocked,
The paints had dried, a painting lay incomplete
Melancholy music flowed from a corner
Everything was dusty
My emotional body lay in a corner
Curled into itself
Curtains drawn on the windows,
No lights or fresh air entered from anywhere
I could hear her cry and ruminate
About the past losses,
My friend had forgotten to live
Right outside the window was a whole new world
Colors, spring, chirping birds,
I didn’t have the courage to call her out,
I proceeded to the attic
Brushing my hands against the window so slightly

My attic greeted me with coldness,
Locked, the key lost somewhere,
I felt unwelcomed and in unfamiliar place
A few cracks from which I could see the rot inside
It was dark and murky and inhabitable
I shouted aghast when its resident tapped my shoulder
Chains bound her arms, legs and body
The entire weight carried by her shoulders
Her eyes sunken, her cranium weirdly shaped
‘I am your mental body,’ in a flat voice she said.

I ran as far as I could,
How was it possible I do not know,
As far as I remember the only way out of the attic
Was to go below
Yet I ran horizontally on another plane
Memories from my childhood zooming around me
White path, white walls, blinding white everywhere
Shadows erupted, ghosts of my past
Four lanes diverged in front of me,
Three circles ahead, three behind
I stood at the transition I realized.
An omnipresent, omniscient voice thus spoke –
You have successfully cleared the test,
You may now enter the other realms,
Having successfully survived all illusions,
You are now ready to receive Divine Vision.

In a snap I was back in company of my soul
In the same position as before
A little less helpless, a lot more baffled
‘Eh?’ I said.
My soul laughed
Startled all looked at it
It was my favorite sound though,
The melody washing over me,
Healing, cleansing, and powerful,
As if Life Herself had come to visit me.

Finally, my soul spoke so –
‘It seems you have one more lesson to learn,
Come, I shall show you my home.’
In a blinding flash of golden light all was be gone,
I was floating, my soul holding my hand
Navigating me to the source of it all
Towards the Creator,
With all my bodies left behind,
Only the seventh one had remain,
It merged with the golden light,
Pointing at ‘the Me’ left on the mundane plane.

I heard a voice resounding through this body,
A voice similar to the mother singing a lullaby,
A million times gentler,
Of pure love it rung.
‘Rest my child,’ it said,
‘You’ve done enough. Rest.
Rest your body, it needs to heal.
Rest your heart, so it can once again feel.
Rest your mind of the ceaseless chatter
Clear those blockages that only cause you harm,
Beliefs that are only blockages,
Thoughts which pull you down.
Rest. You’ve given enough.
Now it’s time for you to receive.
Let go and learn to take,
As much as you with open arms give,
The hurt, anguish, and anger – forgive
Let go of the resentment
Move on from those unfulfilled dreams
Somethings aren’t meant to be
Some people aren’t yours to be
Cut those cords,
The world isn’t yours to save
These burdens aren’t yours to bear.’

A backward I involuntarily took,
With new knowledge and clarity my body shook,
I listened patiently to the voice
Learning, un-learning, and re-learning,
It felt nice.
After a while we came back to the mundane,
Visiting all the other planes
Again we were together,
My mind, body, soul and I.
My mind and I nodded at each other,
Both our inflated egos crushed,
It hid in a corner somewhere,
Looking at my heart with an ounce less of its previous disdain.
I walked to my heart, watered its gardens,
This time, I knocked at the door,
Gifted it a vial full of the golden light,
Together we went into the open, and let it loose,
Calling it a mutual truce.
I visited the weaver next,
Helped her to cut some of those unrequired threads,
She looked at me in gratitude,
As many a connection we sat and reviewed.
Evening came and I climbed up to my room,
Took my inner child, gave her a bath,
Adorned her in night clothes, opened one of her windows
Singing her favorite lullaby,
I put her too sleep.
I spent the night with my intellect,
Many significant things we discussed,
I sat and rusted its chains,
While speaking to her of the wonderful things
I had seen and heard in my journeys
When dawn broke, the chains were significantly less,
Less in number, less tangled,
I took her leave and told her to rest.

I walked to my soul
It stood there in the same place
A little less broken, a little more alive
I broke down in its embrace.
‘I’m sorry,’ I sobbed,
‘It’s okay,’ it said,
A little less baffled, a little more aware,
My mind, body, soul and I
A new life we began.

-Amee Parikh
Mumbai, India

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